This trend has even been observed in research. One such study is found in the American Psychological Association Journal. Within the 6-week experiment, the researchers found that prosocial behaviour (i.e., doing acts of kindness for other or for the world) led to greater increases in psychological flourishing (i.e., a state of good mental and physical health).
Yet, for many people, we may not propagate nor observe these bouts of kindness as often as we would like. There can be many reasons why, with a common reason being that others are not nice to us.
Many of us can start off the day feeling chirpy and full of positivity. But this cycle can be easily interrupted. It can be a result of external or internal forces. For some people with dark-triad personalities (i.e., psychopathy, narcissism, exploitative, deceitful, etc.), they can intentionally act unkindly to cause others unhappiness. Even for those who do not possess such traits, when put on the receiving end of unkindness, we are also likely to reciprocate those action.
So, how can we be more aware of and practice more prosocial behaviour regardless of the responses we receive?
1. Start the Loop (Restart If Needed)
While we cannot control the actions of others, we can definitely control our reactions to them. Start off the day with this resolution in mind: Be Kind. Throughout the day, you will encounter many different types of people. People who add to your happiness cycle and people who try to take away from it.
If you run into the latter, just remember, you are in control of your reactions. You can choose to react negatively to a negative action and go down the spiral of unkindness or you can choose to laugh it off and not let them affect your cycle.
2. Steer Clear of Interruptions
Be that as it may, it is normal to feel demoralised if we run into the negative types of people throughout the day. We can only handle so much. So, we can steer clear of these negative forces in our lives.
For example, if we know that there is a friend that constantly finds ways to interrupt our happiness cycle, let us choose ourselves and bid them adieu because they do not add value to your well-being. The same applies to every aspect of our lives, let us reasonably cut off the things and people that do not spark joy in us.
3. Stop and Think Before Disrupting
Others do not always have to be the ones disrupting cycles of happiness. Sometimes, we may not realise it, but we end up falling into the behaviour of a disruptor. When we have bad days, we may not react in the best ways to others and that will interrupt their kind-happy loop. Before we do that, let us take a moment to look at how our bad reaction can snowball into something worse.
Even for those who might have accidentally unleashed unpleasantries, there are still pathways to redemption. You would be surprised how far simple acts like acknowledging the errors and apologising for them sincerely can go.
Remember, people who are kind are happier and vice versa. This loop is fragile, but it does not mean that we cannot maintain it. We just have to put in the conscientious effort to continue the loop and spread kindness as well as happiness.
If you would like some tips on how to be kinder to feel happier, please feel free to get in touch with our in-house counsellors, Ms. Harshali Kotekar (hr2@executiveship.com) and Ms. Glenda D’Silva (welfare2@samundra.com).
